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Politics

Politics 

Arsonist Brags About Orphans He Saved From Fire He Started

103 Views

Washington, D.C. – Local man Joe Biden is boasting about his incredible act of courage in saving orphans from a

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Elder Care 

Country With President Currently Waiting In His Underwear For Great Pumpkin Worried Putin Is Crazy

136 Views

New polling data suggests Americans are increasingly concerned how President Biden will deal with a potentially insane Vladimir Putin, once

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Politics 

Sneak Peek: Biden Nails State Of Union Address By Triumphantly Soiling Himself

124 Views

Washington, D.C. – Daily Bystander reporters have seen an early copy of President Biden’s State of the Union address, which

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Pandemic 

To Keep Up With Rate The Science Changes, School Textbooks Now Published By Etch A Sketch

75 Views

St.Paul, MN – Given the dazzling speed in which “The Science” is apparently changing, schools across America have begun publishing

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Politics 

Breaking News: This Didn’t Age Well

207 Views

That’s it. That’s all we got.

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Politics 

Democrats Demand Arizona and Wisconsin 2020 Votes Be Decertified

124 Views

New York, NY – Democrats across the country have taken to the streets to demand 2020 presidential election results from

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Politics 

Approval Ratings Continue To Plummet For Andrew McCarthy And Jonathan Silverman

151 Views

Southhampton, NY – Latest polling data reflect continued voter disapproval of the Presidential job being performed by both Andrew McCarthy

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Politics 

State Department Somberly Announces Russia’s Invasion Of Ukraine

123 Views

Washington, D.C. – State Department spokesperson Ned Price paused a blaring party playlist to somberly and officially confirm that Russia

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Election 2022 

Democrats Propose Using New YouTube Downvoting System For Upcoming 2022 Elections

98 Views

Harrisburg, PA – Facing a widely predicted electoral bloodbath, Democratic lawmakers are proposing a new law overhauling the 2022 election

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Pandemic 

White House Continues To Recommend Using Masks Made Of Checks From Pfizer

103 Views

Washington, D.C. – While much of the civilized world are moving away from mask mandates, officials in the Biden White

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DC Comics Announces Highly Anticipated The Death Of The Superman Franchise

DC Comics Announces Highly Anticipated The Death Of The Superman Franchise

Google Announces New Pixel X Phone That Invents Racist Events For Users

Google Announces New Pixel X Phone That Invents Racist Events For Users

Man Continues Family’s Proud Tradition Of Military Service By Adding Ukrainian Flag To Twitter Bio

Man Continues Family’s Proud Tradition Of Military Service By Adding Ukrainian Flag To Twitter Bio

This Time Of Year, Parents Struggle With Right Age To Tell Children Covid Vaccine Isn’t Real

This Time Of Year, Parents Struggle With Right Age To Tell Children Covid Vaccine Isn’t Real

Welcome to the Meh

Welcome to the Meh

Amazon Now Offering Free 2-Day Delivery Of Pregnant Employees To Abortion Clinics Nationwide

Amazon Now Offering Free 2-Day Delivery Of Pregnant Employees To Abortion Clinics Nationwide

Court Ends Abortions So All Children Have Opportunity To Enjoy These Wonderful Pfizer Vaccines

Court Ends Abortions So All Children Have Opportunity To Enjoy These Wonderful Pfizer Vaccines

Women Scrambling To Get Pregnant So They Can Abort Child Before Supreme Court Ruling

Women Scrambling To Get Pregnant So They Can Abort Child Before Supreme Court Ruling

Facebook Demands Everyone Write Hateful Things About Russians For Two Minutes Each Day

Facebook Demands Everyone Write Hateful Things About Russians For Two Minutes Each Day

Tchaikovsky Music Banned After Refusing To Denounce Putin

Tchaikovsky Music Banned After Refusing To Denounce Putin

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Ukraine Now Asking Russia For Protection From Biden Administration

Ukraine Now Asking Russia For Protection From Biden Administration

Model UN Students Horrified To Discover They’re The Actual United Nations

Model UN Students Horrified To Discover They’re The Actual United Nations

With Relaunch Of G4, Gamers Petition For Return Of Esquire Network

With Relaunch Of G4, Gamers Petition For Return Of Esquire Network

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