Voters Excited To Put GOP Back In Power Have Hopes Dashed Remembering It’s the GOP They’re Putting Back In Power

With the 2022 mid-terms scheduled for next week, across the country voters excited at the prospect of sweeping the GOP back into national power are having their hopes dashed after remembering it’s the GOP they’re sweeping back into power.

Citizens have been galvanized by the promises to push back against the monopoly of control the Democrats have wielded to destroy the country and are temporarily excited to see the GOP gradually shuffle down that same path once elected.

Turnout for conservative candidates is expected to be high, campaigning on issues of increased energy production and border security, even though most supporters are now realizing all of that will eventually devolve into a GOP-sponsored drag event at the Reagan library.

While crowds have been invigorated by powerful campaign speeches from newcomers like Blake Masters and JD Vance, most listeners can’t help but envision future speeches by Utah Senator Mitt Romney sobbing about the lack of civility on the Republican aisle before caucusing with Democrats.

Previously enthusiastic voters are now accepting the eventuality that even ‘America First’ candidates will morph into ‘America First Thing We Get To After Helping Ukraine Pay Their Rent This Month’ figure heads.

College student Ben Webber still plans to vote for Republicans, knowing full well he’s in store for years of Mitch McConnell explaining why they can’t do anything to help the country. “It may be a pyrrhic victory, but at the very least I’m confident they’ll finally cancel PBS once and for all…right?”