Entire Nation In NFL Concussion Protocol After Being Hit By Broncos/Colts Game
Denver, CO – A groggy nation awoke Friday morning to find itself in the NFL’s concussion protocol ‘blue tent’, after witnessing the Indianapolis Colts defeat the Denver Broncos 12-9 on Thursday Night Football, in what many observers are calling one of the ugliest, most brutal games football fans have ever been forced to watch. Fans were observed aimlessly staggering away from the vicious blow of football mediocrity, unable to answer even the simplest of questions about why QB Russell Wilson would throw into the end zone with under two minutes remaining. Doctors were especially cautious with the damage this three hour plus beating delivered, knowing how dangerous a second, similar hit could be with the Redskins scheduled to play the Bears next Thursday night. “We saw hints of head trauma, like continuing to watch even after this pathetic display of offense went into overtime, but there were no obvious red flags,” stated neurosurgeon Pete Barkley. “However, when reports started surfacing after watching the Broncos game, people were suggesting the incessant Amazon Rings of Power ads were “starting to look pretty cool”, we knew it was time to demand the entire nation step into the tent.” Long term studies of former NFL fans show they can only take so much abuse before later in life suffering serious quality of life issues, like slowly becoming Major League Soccer fans.