Villain Postpones Attacks On New Super Heroine Until He Sees Her Haircut
Reports from inside the secret lair of the evil Dr.Diablo indicate the villain is holding off attacking the city’s newly appeared super heroine until he’s gotten a better look at her haircut. Reviewing various surveillance camera across the city, he’s been unable to determine if she possesses long, feminine locks or something shorter and hence, far more dangerous. “If she’s sporting something long and bouncy like a Pantene commercial, I’m pretty confident I can deploy any number of diabolical schemes to defeat her, bwahahahahaha!”, boasted the devilish mastermind. “If it’s more an 80’s Meg Ryan short bob, uhh…I might have a problem here.” The dark overlord who controls other-worldly demons then took a deep breath and sighed, “But if we’re talking about one of those shaved sides of the head but keep the top longer haircuts, I’m a dead man.” At the time of this reporting, the chance of facing someone so clearly the visual embodiment of a ‘strong woman’ has Diablo already updating his LinkedIn page and reconnecting with former colleagues at Office Depot.