Fauci Admits Engineering Virus To End Human Race For Lizard Overlords; Republicans Pounce

Washington DC – Republicans launched a series of political attacks against NIAID Director Dr. Anthony Fauci, after he admitted creating the Covid-19 virus under orders from lizard overlords living beneath the Earth’s surface.  Conservative media pounced on the news, fueling their multi-year partisan campaign to assign blame for a disease that has beset the world. 

Former President Donald Trump continued his obsession with Fauci’s handling of the virus, that we now know Fauci helped create. Through his office, Trump released a self-serving statement absurdly declaring: “Today’s news confirms the need to investigate Dr. Fauci’s betrayal of the entire human race. Sad.” 

GOP political rallies remain marred with frightening chants of “arrest him”, exploiting unfounded accusations that Fauci partnered with reptilians seeking mankind’s enslavement, to which Fauci conceded as much last week.  Republicans seemingly have no plans to end criticisms of overworked medical professionals and their honest errors in judgment and/or alignment with conquering lizard armies.